We are all born selfish beings, crying our hearts out if we are hungry, have a dirty nappy or simply want attention. We never once consider if our poor tired parents need to do something as mundane as sleep (never mind that we howl the place down when we are tired ourselves).

As the months pass, our every little milestone is cheered on enthusiastically as we grow & develop at a stupendous rate. We still throw monumental tantrums if we don't get our own way, but this time there is a subtle difference.

We have learnt that the best time for these performances is when there are other people around & we can embarrass Mummy & Daddy. We are starting to become aware of the feelings of others & how we can manipulate them to get what we want.

Children are in fact the world's best influencers; they are masters of the art of negotiation. They remain fixated on their goal, they know persistence will bring reward and do not worry about what the other person thinks of them; it is simply not as important as securing their hearts desire at that moment in time.

But skip forward a few years & most of us have lost the skill. In becoming aware of the needs of others we somehow become scared to take the leap; to go after what we really, really want. The fear of failure often leads to the safety of inaction.

So what is it that those who have faced up to the fear can teach us? How do they overcome it to succeed? What would a successful L&D freelancer advise if they could go back in time & counsel themselves as they started their business?

I have asked this question a lot recently; time & again the message is the same - you have got to find a way through the fear; to find your own way to sell yourself, to network, to market yourself, to say look at me I am brilliant.

Their answers reminded me that to drive my business forward I need to "reward success, celebrate failure & punish inaction". That it is ok to try something out & make a mistake because it is a heck of a lot better than simply wishing.

Most of all they reminded me that if my 10-year-old self could come & chat to me now, she would say "Duh! Just do it." The good news is that I listened & have had a fabulous week!

Thank you to everyone for your kind words and wisdom.