This article from the Guardian about being assertive v being aggressive is interesting.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2009/aug/03/how-to-be-assertive
I think StokeyMark has hit on something – most of us are unaware of (or unwilling to admit) our behaviour is unhelpful to others, whether that’s ’shy’, ‘assertive’ or ‘aggressive’… Definitions depend on your personal point of view – what’s ‘aggressive’ for one person can just be ‘assertive’ to someone else. Also depends on the type and culture of the organisation.
Unfortunately none of us sees ourselves as others see us – it’s always someone else who’s behaving badly, right? That’s why it’s so important to find out how others see us – we need to know!
Even the super confident Apprentice candidates got an inkling that they might not have been absolutely brilliant absolutely all the time..
http://www.track360feedback.com/2009/06/09/the-apprentice-holding-up-a-professional-mirror-with-feedback/
And for good measure, here’s what the Guardian’s own Charlie Brooker said..
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/mar/31/television