Who would be a Training Manager? In an effort to soothe the profession's seething resentments we thought it would be nice to share those deep dark moments in Training we all dread!
It takes years of hard work and serious application to get where you are today. You spend your life absorbing and interpreting the latest training methods that no one else seems to care about - except for other Training Managers - and what thanks do you get?
Well this week The Brain Bath?! would like to give you the opportunity to have a bit of a whinge. To inspire your pent up frustrations we have devised a 'training nightmares' top ten to get you going. Post your nightmares/amusing anecdotes at the bottom of this article.
Top ten Training nightmares
1. You arrive at the company all fired up to Train your delegates about motivation only to find that half the staff due to attend have just been laid off before the session.
2. Workers quit immediately after training.
3. You decide to try board breaking only to find your board doesn’t break(D'oh!)
4. Your training is with a group of international colleagues who don’t speak English (and nobody hired a translator).
5. One worker starts to reveal their rather interesting life story in the middle of the session (everyone is gripped!)
6. Your task is to chair a motivational training session for a group of unemployed people.
7. You are booked to hold a training session on health and safety at a fire station.
8. You've prepared for the session, have all the notes ready and a set of new exercises to try out, you're even 20 mins early. It's then that you discover you're in the wrong room, in the wrong venue and in the wrong part of town...
9. You're training abroad with a translator. You spend 10 minutes explaining your concepts, which the translator then turns into 10 words (thanks to Steve Dineen of fuel for that one).
10. You are explaining some complex medical condition when all of a sudden one of the trainees rushes out of the room in flood of tears. It turns out that her close relative recently passed away from that condition (thanks to Lisa Hodges for that one).
Training quotes from the BBC TV Series 'The Office'
Rowan: "Gareth, quick trust exercise, ultimate fantasy?"
Gareth: "Hmm?"
David: "We’re just doing the ultimate fantasy, we’re all doing it"
Gareth: "Two lesbians probably, sisters. I’m just watching"
Rowan: "OK. Erm. Tim? Do you have one?"
Tim: "I’d never thought I’d say this, but can I hear more from Gareth please?"
Dawn: "He proposed on a Valentine’s day, although he didn’t do it face to face, he did it in one of the little Valentine message bits in the paper. I think he had to pay for it by the word, because it just said ‘Lee love Dawn, marriage?’ which, you know I like, because it’s not often you get something that’s both romantic and thrifty."
